Person on the Road

Day 6: Pennsylvania

It was time to head back north to pick up Julia’s for our meeting in the french consulate in Boston. I wanted to take a different route than the one I used to get to Baltimore, so following my cousin’s advice, I started driving towards the finger lakes in NY.

In Pennsylvania, I drove along the Susquehanna river. I saw some Amish women having a picnic on the river bank.

I thought it would be nice to have my own lunch on the river bank, but had no food. I then passed an Amish farmer’s market, and then a general store. I started driving back, picking up some bread, cheese and salami in the general store, vegetables at the farmer’s market and looked for a place to eat, not before accidentally stepping into an auction of produce.

I stopped in a parking area on the river bank, made some Israeli salad, and my lunch was ready.

I kept on driving, and found myself in “Reptiland”. I had to go in and check it out. It’s a small zoo dedicated, of course, to reptiles. They had a couple of crocodiles, tons of lizards and snakes, a butterfly garden where you hang out with a bunch of butterflies flying all around you, and the ugliest animal I’ve ever seen - an Alligator Snapping Turtle:

In the back, they had some robotic, full scale dinosaurs. One was even squirting water out of its mouth.

Because I got distracted from my course so much, I reached the finger lakes much later than I planned to. I stopped at Taughannock falls.

I then took a walk on a trail. In Israel, when you walk along a marked trail and that trail splits into two different trails, those are marked in different colors. Here, they both have the same color, making it impossible for you to know whether or not you’re walking in circles. Also, I lost the trail markings after a few minutes. Just as I realized that - I saw a deer. Now - my instinct told me to follow the deer, but then the voice of reason spoke to me - I will not fall for that, I’ve watched too many movies. When you’re lost, the last thing you should do is follow the deer. It’s a bait, luring you deeper into the forest, getting you even more lost, and turning you into the perfect victim for the Taughannock witch, or the Taughannock chainsaw murderer. I turned back and found the trail.

After walking for way too long, I found myself in an open field, with two shacks. One of them had a creepy drawing of a man on it. I assumed this is where the Taughannock chainsaw murderer lives, and adding to the equation the fact that it was getting dark and that I have lost the trail markings once again, I started walking much faster.

Finally, I found the trail, and just as the sun was setting and I was positive I had been walking in circles, I found myself back at the car. I was saved!

I drove forever looking for a motel. When I finally found one, the office was close. So was next one. The third motel I found, in East Springfield NY, had a sign on the door of the office with a phone number. The dude on the other side of the phone told me to just go into room 8. The door was open and the key was on the table.

Day 5: Baltimore

My Cousin, Guy, lives in Rockville, an hour drive north of Baltimore. We both left Israel to live in the states about the same time - his wife got a post-doc position around here in NIH and he followed along with their daughter. We haven’t been in touch in a while, from way before we moved to the states, so I was really happy for this opportunity to meet him. We said we’d meet today at 5PM, which left me some time to kill in Baltimore.

I drove down to the inner harbor. It was very touristy, but slow at the same time.

I started to wonder around, ended up in a sketchy street. When you’re surrounded by strip clubs - you know you’re in the wrong place. well, if it’s 11AM.

This car had “Bitch” keyed on the front door. Seems like someone went to have some fun and discovered his girlfriend found a new job here:

I googled my options, and decided to walk to the Baislica - the first Catholic church ever built in America:

Inside were maybe two people, sitting on the benches and mumbling to themselves. I noticed the wonderful air-conditioning and let a soft “thank you Jesus” out of my mouth. I sat on a bench and browsed the books in the pocket of the seat – They have the songs there, with the notes and the lyrics and all. After 10 minutes or so I raise my head and found out that some 30 more people joined us, and that service is about to begin. Crap.

The dude said some stupid thing about the kingdom of God being like fishing net. We got up and sat back down a few times, we mumbled (we’ll, I didn’t, but I don’t think anyone noticed) some stuff.

And then the dude had some bread which he started breaking, and some wine that he started pouring. That is a not good at all – what if he comes up to me and tries to stick bread down my throat? I can’t eat that! I’m Jewish!

Luckily, everybody got up and walked to him to get some bread and wine, which was a perfect time for me to get up and leave.

I didn’t want to be a bad Jew and not drink any Christian people’s blood that day; I decided that a good replacement for Jesus’s blood, which is wine, would be St. Patrick’s blood, which is beer, so I headed to look for a tavern. I also reminded myself that people always eat his flesh and drink his blood, but what about breathing his spirit –that wonderful cool air-conditioned air inside the church? I had plenty of that. I think I’m all set.

I got a couple of beers and some chicken sandwich at the Water Street Tavern, while I was watching the a Olympic games.

When I was done, I went back to the car and started driving towards Rocksville. I got there about an hour early, so I killed some time in a plaza, eating terrible ice cream I bought at the Dollar Tree and checking out Hobby Works, an awesome hobby store. I love radio controlled cars and airplanes, model trains such! That’s one of the big disadvantages of moving around - you can’t engage in hobbies that require having a large work-space, your own tools, and storing space.

I then went to my cousin’s place. His parents, my favorite uncle and aunt, had just arrive from Israel for a visit. They didn’t know I was coming so it was quite a surprise for them to see me. We talked for an hour or two, and when they collapsed, me and Guy left drove to Georgetown to get dinner and some beers. We talked about our work, compared living in Israel and in the US, and discovered we’re both very passionate about atheism. Too bad we drifted apart all these years, but that’s life. I’m really glad I went to see him.

Guy and his wife insisted I stay for the night, which was a great idea. Their 6 year old daughter was kind enough to sleep with her parents, leaving me her tiny bed. It was so amusing waking up next to a tiny tea-party table.

Day 4: Made it to Baltimore!

Today I mostly drove. I had a lot of driving to do in order to make it to Baltimore on a reasonable hour.

I’m not completely sure whether this is due to missing a turn or not, but I did end up driving through NYC. Manhattan, to be more specific. Of course I got stuck in traffic, and then I noticed that I’m not doing very well on gas. The fact that the gas meter was dropping rapidly while I was on a narrow, one lane bridge caused me a minor heart attack, but somehow I made it through, got out of NYC, and stopped for fuel at Paterson, NJ. It didn’t seem like the best place in the world, but I still wanted to park and hang out. Only when I realized I don’t have any quarters for the parking meter, I decided to drive on.

I stopped for lunch at Newark, NJ, in a Jamaican, well, place. they sell food and tickets for Reggae concerts. I had brownstew (?) chicken with rice and beans and some cabbage salad. That was pretty good. It was fun watching everybody play “don’t-stare-at-the-bald-white-guy”.

Next, I left the highway to visit Bethlehem PA. No special reason. turns out there’s an awsome music festival there soon. Other than that everything I ran into was closed. Maybe I didn’t go deep enough into the city, but I didn’t find it too exciting.

The rest of the drive through Pennsylvania was beautiful. I passed through small place like Kutztown, which looks just as cute as its name sounds. There’s a fair there on the 13th, which means we might catch it on our way from Maine to Maryland right before our flight.

I stopped for some coffee, ehem, somewhere, which was good since I got to witness this little place:

Witty, isn’t it?

And about an hour or two later I made it to Julia’s sister’s place in Baltimore, MD. Since her sister was not back yet from work, I took a seat on the bar in Dimitri’s Tavern, right around the corner. They serve peanuts, but there are no bowls for the shells. People just use the floor:

Also, a beer is only 1.75! I had three beers, and then went to Julia’s sister’s place, where I unloaded our stuff. Success!

Day 3: Goodbye Boston

Today, was so stressful… I slept so bad last night, mostly because I went to bed drunk, but also since I had to sleep on the old sofa. Arggghh! The damn sofa! As I was waiting for Eyal (also known in the Lab as “the OTHER Eyal”, since I got to the lab first) I found in may email inbox some good news - we have a contract for the apartment in Paris. The bad news - I had to pay the fees to the agency, and my credit cards would not let me spend that amount. So I made some phone calls and sent some emails and hopefully by tomorrow morning it will all be resolved. Why do I deserve all this stress?!

One noteworthy call was with my bank, as I was asking them to allow me to charge my visa with more money that I have.

- “Sir, you have a $1000 limit on your card.”

- “I know, that’s why I’m calling. I need more.”

- “Well, I can transfer money from your checking account to your Visa account”.

This is totally not the way things work in Israel. I’m so confused.

- “I think that’s exactly what I want”

- “How much do you need ?”

- “Like 900 something Euros.”

- “Sir, I need an exact number.”

- “Hold on, I have the email… I need 994.09 Euros.”

- “Sir, I can also transfer US dollars”

- “O.K., so however that much it is dollars”

- “Sir, I don’t know how much it is.”

Is she kidding? also, if she calls me “sir” one more time….

- “hold on, let me google that for you.”

I was so pleased with myself…

I was then comforted by some more good news - we have an appointment at the French consulate on Monday. We actually have one appointment for the both of us, which I think is a good sign: it means that the French dudes understand the urgency of our case.

The other Eyal came and helped me take the stupid sofa to his place, form where he’ll get rid of it on garbage collection day, basically saving my ass. In Israel it would have been so much easier getting rid of a couch. I’m not sure what that implies about Israel. Or America.

Now the apartment was finally empty, and it was time to return the keys to the landlady. I also gave her a cup Julia made as a present, and in return she gave me some fruit for the road:

I really don’t know what the small things are. She said they’re Chinese. I believe her (Edit - they turned out to be lichees, with a peel that is much darker than I’m used to).

I started driving towards Maryland. I stopped for lunch at Harry’s, in Westborough, MA. I got the “Boneless chicken breast deluxe”, also known in Israel as Schintzel.

Then I drove some more - a lot more actually. I made a stop in a visitor center, right at the border of Connecticut. There I saw a gate that said “Please close gate behind you”. That means you can go through! I went in to discover a catch-and-release trout fishing area. Being the only only one around, I started walking along the riverbank, and after ten minutes or so sat down, got a book from my backpack, and read for a while.

Yeah, I know it’s very pretty. I was also thinking how in Israel, a place like this would be a big thing: ooh - water! and green trees! and we’d probably have some stories about this place from the time of the Romans, and the crusaders, and the war of Independence, and they would fence it and charge money at the entrance. Here, in America, it’s just a stream where you catch trout.

After getting tired of reading and getting bit by mosquitoes, I continued driving and ended up in Danbury, CT. After checking in at the local Super-8 motel I went to the Molly Darcy bar. It’s an Irish pub, with the heavy wood and the Irish bartender with heavy Irish accent complaining about his Irish health - the whole deal! Had a couple of beers and the spinach salad while I was watching the Olympics. In fact, two TV screens were showing the Olympics games - men basketball and women football (soccer, if you’re an American). on two other TV screens were more American sports - baseball and poker. The differences in the appearances of the participants is astounding - everybody is so fit in basket ball and soccer. I don’t need to describe baseball players, football players, or, god forbid - poker. Makes you think, doesn’t it ? Are baseball and basketball more popular in America because you can play them even if you’re fat, or were these sports invented for an obese nation?

While we’re at it, am I the only one who finds it absurd that McDonald’s and Coca Cola sponsor the American Olympics teams?

Day 2: a Cambridge Sofa

I’m pretty drunk so I’ll try to keep this short. I should also reconsider the time in which I make my posts. Perhaps posting right before I sleep isn’t the best idea.

Today was quite eventful. I woke up to find out that right next to my motel there’s a model ship kit store:

One day, when I grow up, I’ll build model ships. It seems like a real cool hobbie. besides the kits they also sell tools and books for building model ships. sooooo cool…..

I drove on the Maine turnpike, making two stops - one to eat a burger, and one to call lady B, who’s supposed to take care of our internships in Paris, and is doing a terrible job. She said she talked to the dude in the consulate, and he promised an answer by the afternoon. needless to say, he never gave an answer.

I arrived to our place in Central Square, Cambridge, in the late afternoon, and called our landlady. She asked if we emptied the apartment, and I replied that the sofa that was here when we moved in is still here. She insisted that the sofa should be removed. After fighting with her for a while I realized that I have to find a solution to this damn sofa, which turned out to be a real pain in the ass - nobody wants to deal with old furniture if it’s not in perfect condition. The salvation army, MIT furniture exchange, the Media Lab community, the MIT computer science community - nobody wants to deal with a sofa. A fellow Israeli from the Media Lab offered assistance, and we’ll see tomorrow how that turns out (stay tuned), but that still means I will leave for Maryland only later tomorrow. well, whatever.

I then went to the Muddy Charles, MIT’s notorious pub, to meet Sharly. I first met Sharly, a post-doc physicist in MIT, right as I arrived to Cambridge, and he immediately became one of my favorite people. Not only is he kind and funny, he’s unbelievably musically talented. He brought along a friend, another Israeli named Avi (also bald, like me, Sharly, and the rest of our Israeli gang) and together we demolished three pints of the Sam Summer ale.

I returned to the apartment, talked to Julia on the phone, and proceeded to Hi-Fi Pizza, where the pizza is a bizarre combination of really low quality, really low price, and amazing taste.

And now, I shall collapse. stay tuned.

Day 1: A night in Searsport

We are all packed. We started driving at about 10AM towards Maine. It was a typical summer day in New England - which basically means rain. We stopped for lunch in Augusta. Too bad it wasn’t a Tuesday:

You gotta have some seafood if you’re in Maine. Americans, however, deep-fry everything. They will deep-fry their own families, given enough oil:

By the late afternoon, we got to Deer Isle. Haystack has amazing facilities for teaching weaving, graphics, photography, dying, glass-blowing, and working with woos, metal and clay. There is also a fab-lab, where some of our colleagues from the Media Lab will be mentoring.

After saying my goodbyes to Julia, I turned back to find a place to stay for the night. Entering Deer Isle was easy, but leaving was hard, as I had no 3G reception, and could not navigate with my phone. After about an hour of driving in circles, I remembered Julia keeps an old-fashioned map in the car. I managed to escape Deer Isle.

I missed a turn and found myself in Bucksport. The weather was starting to get clearer, and I got this beautiful panorama with a rainbow and some mist over the Penobscot river.

Next stop was Searsport. We drove by it on our way to Deer Isle and it looked really cute, with several motels, a flee market and a model ship store on the main street. I decided to spend the night there, and got a room at the Yardarm Motel. Searsport is tiny and sleepy, and as I got settled in my room it was 8:45PM, which made finding dinner a little tricky. I found the Mermaid bar in a nearby inn. Besides the staff, I was the only one there. I had some beers and a pretty good maple broiled salmon. The owner asked me what brings me to Searsport. I told her the whole story, and she was blown away. We talked some more about technology and cognition - it turns out she studied software engineering, and decided to give up her career at some point to become a stay-at-home mom. When the kids got older and she found herself in Searsport, she started running the Inn.

Some guy walked in and said he and the boys are going squid fishing - or at least I think it was squids. What ever they were fishing , they had to fish it at night. Turns out this is what the guys here do for fun. I should have joined them. Next time. I had to get some sleep.

How did I get into this mess?

The original plan seemed perfect: Julia goes away to a two-weeks glass blowing workshop in Haystack, a craft school in Deer Isle, Maine, while I go on a road trip. When we are done, I will pick her up, then we drive to her family in Maryland, and then fly to Paris, where we both have four-months internships waiting for us, as we both graduated from the MIT Media Lab. Lovely, isn’t it?

Well, not exactly. somebody messed up. In fact, several people did, and as a result, we still don’t have our visas. worse - we don’t even have appointments in the French consulate to apply for visas. You are supposed to have your appointment at least two weeks before your flight. today is July 31. Our tickets are for August 15.

And so the new plan is:

drive Julia to Maine and drop her off
drive back to Boston and return the keys to the landlady, thus officially becoming homeless
drive to Maryland with our stuff to drop off at Julia’s sister’s place
hopefully, have an appointment by then
drive back to Maine, and pick up Julia
drive to Boston and apply for visa at the French consulate
drive to Maine, drop off Julia back at the workshop
drive around the states until the workshop is over
drive to Maine, pick up Julia
drive to Boston, for a secret mission, to be revealed here when accomplished
drive to Maryland, where we will stay for a couple of days
fly to France
live happily ever after

I will try to post here at least once a day, and since this is the second day of this adventure, this post doesn’t count, I owe you two more posts. here we go.