Day 12. Mile 2600. Oakley, KS.

So we went to the Underground Salt Museum. Now that I have your attention, let’s start at the top:

We started driving north, and near Yoder we could not ignore the sign to the Underground Salt Museum. First we stopped for brunch at the Carriage Crossing Restaurant and Bakery. When Julia noticed me staring at the waitresses she said “I know what you’re thinking - they all look the same”. Actually, I was thinking that the Amish waitress was pretty hot. Now, I want to clarify - of course, I like looking at pretty women, but more than that I enjoy all those little funny thoughts. For example, there’s nothing more cheesy than a hot Amish waitress, is there? There are music videos directors that built their entire career on them. I wonder if she actually does go home after a shift, listen to Aerosmith in her headphones as she lets her hair down, in slow motion, of course. I had more of these thoughts, but they were cut off when Chris Griffin, the Family Guy kid showed up and started cleaning the tables.

We had our brunch and moved on to the Underground Salt Museum, one of Kansas’s eight wonders (!!). Sarcastic, parenthesized exclamation marks aside - the museum is pretty cool. Over 600 ft. underground, it shows you around the salt mines. This salt is mostly used to clear snow off the roads.

Because of the dry, stable climate in the mine, they use the mines also as storage area, for anything from documents to film sets and costumes. This is one of 20 “Agent Smiths” used in the final battle scene of the 3rd Matrix movie:


We also took “the dark ride”, a cool, slow ride around the mines with a funny guide: “To your left, you’ll notice a wooden stand with a fire extinguisher. Salt is not flammable, but you know what is? wooden stands with fire extinguishers on them”.

We then drove on. We stopped by the Barbed Wire Museum in La Crosse, KS. It was closed, but there was some interesting art outside:

With one Kansas wonder down and seven more to go (but they will have to wait) we drove on, but we made the classic mistake of driving too late with too little gas and too far from civilization. We were getting a little nervous. Finally we found a gas station that I believe was actually a left-behind set from a David Lynch movie: surrounded by complete darkness, with the single light, the rattling flag post in the strong wind… the works.

We stopped for the night in stinky Oakley, KS, and I say that not because it’s a bad town. I say that just because it smells really bad. 


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